Archive for the ‘Odds and Ends’ Category

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For those hard to buy people

December 4, 2007

We all have those kind of people in our lives.  Shoot, it may be you!  In the process of looking for great Christmas finds on the net, I have stumbled across incredibly unique gifts.

Without further ado….

For the guy who has everything:

1.  Duct tape wallet – purty, purty, shiny, shiny.  (And to make it extra special, don’t forget to have it gift boxed for only $4.50!)

2. Mothership cufflinks – be ready for the invasion!

3. Classy wino bag – he can be green, drunk, and stylish all at the same time.

For the gal who has everything:

1.  Body necklace – maybe a gift Drew Peterson got from his cousin!

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 2.  Saucy tampon cases – 2 words that should NEVER go together: saucy and tampon….HELLO!

3.  Gnome kidnapping sculpture – nothing says ‘Live, Love and Laughter’ like this garden accessory.

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Would you Deja Vu??

November 1, 2007

I recently watched the movie Deja Vu.  Yes, I’m always behind when it comes to movies.  It really intrigued me…got me thinking.

For those of you who haven’t seen it….it’s basically about a tragedy that killed hundreds of people and the government accidently found a way to bend time so they can see the in past as it is happening.  After a bunch of twists and turns, Denzel Washington decides to go back in time to catch the bad guy before he blows up all these people. 

The whole deal was…should he do it to save all these people knowing that it most likely would change the course of history.

So would you?  If you could go back, one time, any time….would you?

When would you go back?  Why would you go back?

My first reaction was HECK YEAH!  I’d go back and warn myself about “something”…wait, no…I’d warn my parents.

But if I did, I wouldn’t be me today.  Remember, we are who we are because of the experiences we’ve gone through…good or bad.  I kind of like who I am right now.  It’s been a long hard road, but I’m finally happy with me.

And what if I did warn somebody to save a person and that caused more people to get hurt or worse yet, killed?

Obviously God has set time in motion and that motion is forward.

…but, would you go back?

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Are you cheap?

October 2, 2007

I’m not as cheap as I could be.

Veronica at Toddled Dredge wrote a post about being cheap and wanted to know what one thing everyone else was cheap on.  My first reaction was…I’m not cheap on anything.  But I’ve been doing some thinking on that and By Golly…everyone is cheap on at least one thing in their life.

My husband’s one thing is groceries….uh, hello!  That seriously conflicts with my need to eat.

I used to be cheap on anything that had to do with hair…haircut, dye job, products, etc.  Now that I’m getting older and have more grey hair than my Mum (ok, so I have more hair than my mum right now too, but you get my point) I’m not settling anymore.  I may not go in every 4-6 weeks, but I still go in and get the job done right and dyed right and then I use just the right products.  And dang it I don’t feel guilty!  ….much….

I’m definitely not cheap when it comes to coffee either.  It’s actually gotten worse.  Now that Target is carrying Dunkin Donuts coffee, I’ve added a new mixture of grounds to my morning routine.  YUM!

So my cheap secret?

I’m cheap when it comes to shoes.  How sad is that?!  You would think I would respect my feet much more than that, but not so much.  I LOVE shoes and can’t seem to have enough, but the idea of spending more than $35 for a pair of shoes just about sends me over.  I have to work a little harder as far as finding the right deals and when to go for the sales, but it’s SO worth it when you walk away with a pair of dang cute sandals for $15 when they were originally $95!! 

What one thing are you cheap on?  If you think you’re cheap on everything…what are you cheapest on?  It’s kind of intriquing…

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Gloom, despair and agony on me!

September 21, 2007

I love Hee Haw.  I grew up cracking up laughing at that show…even those “weird” jokes that I really didn’t get, but my folks were laughing so hard that I just KNEW it had to be hilarious so I cracked a rib over it.  My favorite part was when the guys would get together and sing:

Gloom, despair and agony on me.
Deep dark depression, pain and misery….

Somehow, seeing a bunch of hillbillies singing that song is down right funny!  So as I tell you the strange things afoot in the Ozarks, I dedicate this to my fav hillbillies of all time.

So what is afoot you ask?

See this innocent little butterfly…

 

Well, he ain’t so innocent as he looks.  And yes, I call him, ‘Mr. Butterfly’ for a reason.  I’ve been working in the yard for 2 days….like a bit of a mad woman really.  And I don’t just mean mowing.  I mean, sharpening anything that should be sharp.  Cutting away anything that looks remotely dead.  Trimming up every bush within an 10 mile radius.  I feel like I’m having a bad case of nesting syndrome….I could drop a kid any day now!

Uh, Butterfly, right….so I was sitting on the ground with OldMan discussing the proper way I should sharpen my edger, when Mr. Butterfly decided to pay a visit.  We froze immediately, hoping of all hopes that he would land on one of us.  It took him FOREVER to decide who to land on but in the end I was the honored one.  He actually took a liking to my watch.  (“pretty-pretty, shiney-shiney”)  I got bored and went on sharpening the edger and that bugger wouldn’t leave!  All of a sudden, OldMan said, “Uh, mom?  I think he just peed on you.”  Sure as shootin, there was a tiny bit of cloudy pee on my watch.  Then Mr. Butterfly started jerking around a lot.  I started thinking, “Cloudy pee?  Oh crap…that’s not pee!”  Ewwwww!!!!  What a male thing to do to my watch!  So when it comes time for me to give OldMan the “talk”, it’s going to be about The Butterflies, the Birds, the Bees and the Watch.

You would think that being “inked” was bad enough, but when I say gloom, despair and agony on me…I mean it.  Check these photos out:

                      

Now the pathetic reasons for those babies.  Picture 1 is from…well, I have absolutely no idea.  And it doesn’t hurt a bit!  But isn’t that an odd place for a bruise?!?  Picture 2 is of the back of my right leg-pit.  It’s there because I crossed my leg too long…basically.  I come from a family that couldn’t circulate their own blood to save their lives.  So when I put a crink in it….it lets me know how unhappy it is.  You can imagine what a pain in the butt THAT can be.

And lastly, my mum’s hair has finally all come out (save about 15 pieces of stub).  How has it all come out so quick?  My father has been putting packing tape on her head and ripping it off!!!  They’re such party animals.  Geez, parents are so embarrassing.  But it gets worse.  In honor of her beautifully slick head, she got dad to take a picture of her with a light bulb in her mouth.  Long lives Uncle Festor!!!  I want SO BAD to post this picture as it is probably the most funniest thing I have ever seen, but she won’t let me.  I believe her response was, “Is nothing sacred on your blog?!?!”  No, mum…it’s not.

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What’s a Nascar??

September 10, 2007

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I know I’m living in the Ozarks, but I honestly have NEVER watched a single lap of Nascar races.

Until Saturday night.

They were showing the Nascar Rock and Roll 400.  Yes, as in a bunch of little cars going in a circle 400 times!  The Rock and Roll part came during the pre-show event.  Chris Daughtry!  Owwwww, baby!  That is why I was watching it.  I kept watching because shortly after the concert they all bowed their head to pray.

Yes, I said pray.  I was floored. 

Excuse me?  They still do that thing?  And show it on tv??? 

Shocking.

See, recently a friend of mine, who I think has some sense in her head, announced that she watched Nascar faithfully.  What?!  I, like many others, tend to stereo-type Nascar lovers as people…well, kinda like the ‘gentleman’ pictured above.  I mean, if you look at the commercials that kept running during this show….it was pointed marketing….and I’ll just leave it at that. 

Here’s where I was enlightened:  It’s not just a bunch of cars going in circles.  It’s cool techno gadgets that make cars do insane things.  It’s strategy in play for inching your way up to the front of the pack while still working lap by lap to fine tune your car for the final laps.  It’s timing.  It’s individual bettering yet still working with a teammate.

I can’t say that I watched the entire 400 laps, but I watched enough to see why fans – not just rednecks – get just as worked up over cars going in circles as I get worked up watching my Sooners inch towards a huge goal post 10 yards (or more!) at a time.

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I’m baaaaccccckkkk!!!!

September 6, 2007

Wow…it’s been awhile since I’ve been gone from reality for this long.  I’m sure it wouldn’t feel so over-whelming if I didn’t have a cold the size of a 12-year-old’s chin zit.  Man, colds bite.

Anyhoo…

Because so many people asked to be entertained by my visit to Ohio (hee, hee….all 1 of you!), here are some highlights: 

Van Wert, Ohio – That town is just a small thing, but if you ever drive by you need to stop by their McDonalds.  There’s a sign just inside that says it’s Jerry Lewis’s restaurant.  I’m not entirely sure what that means but it’s like no Mickey D that I’ve ever been in.  The interior consisted of mahoganey wood and marble, a huge LCD t.v. that is placed just aboved the gorgeous gas fireplace.  They play fancy music too.  Not some funky 1980 throwback station.  Unfortunately the food is not different .

The weather in Findlay was so chilly that on my first morning there I decided to go for a morning run instead of a walk.  It was great!  I felt 10 5 years younger and totally invigorated.  Then I proceeded to get a nasty head cold so that ended the whole anti-aging routine for me! (Do you know how sexy I look and feel with tissue up my nose?!)

I forgot how exhausting visitation and funeral schedules are.  J’s family has been in the Findlay area for years so his grandmother had quite the turn out.  I shed more tears than planned.  I’m usually not too weepy, but there were times that were so tender.  Like the time that Howard (Gpa) came around the casket during the funeral and talked to Marie.  He told her how much he missed her and then recited a poem that he wrote for her.  Good Lord, there wasn’t a dry eye in the church!

J did a great job officiating the service.  He loved his grandmother dearly and had a lot of fond memories to share.  I believe he did wonderful job in helping friends and family feel comfortable to laugh and cry.

On the first day there, Gremlin needed to go downstairs to get something, but changed his mind halfway down.  Somehow the message got all confused from his brain to his legs and he proceeded quite quickly down the stairs using his face.  His right eye and nose got the brunt of the fall.  He had a black eye and several deep carpet burns on/around his nose.  Poor guy.  Every picture he looks like he was used as a punching bag.  Nothing was broke so counting my blessing there!

Because of the flood from the previous week, a lot of businesses were closed.  The worst of the flooding seemed to his the business section of town.  Pretty much everything on the outside was cleaned up but the insides were trashed.  It was hard to see such devestation.

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Looks like I’ve been tagged a bit while I was gone and was given some really cool awards.  Can’t wait to post about them.  Just finishing up on the laundry and replugging my nose…will be back with more posts post-haste.  Get it post-haste….ok, whatever….I’ll stop…..

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This bug bites!

August 20, 2007

Last night has got to be one of the worst nights I’ve had since having children.

Sounds a bit dramatic, but even when my kids were babies, they didn’t get up as often as Gremlin did last night. 

Gremlin started throwing up around 7pm and continued all night until 6am this morning.  If he wasn’t throwing up he was tossing and turning because he was hot or “just not tired”.  I think I got around 2 hours of sleep…total!

How the hey-hoo did I do that in college?!?!

I remember staying up all night helping a friend with puking problems.  It wasn’t exactly from the flu, but puke is puke, people!  It’s messy and it stinks!

This morning I feel like I’ve been up all night puking.  Coffee’s not helping one iota.  And it’s all dark due to the storm, so all I want to do is curl up and saw some logs.

On a side note (I hate complaining on my blog, but…), I’ve heard a lot of people talk about how cancer has become an epidemic.  Then why can’t we find more scarves at retail stores for cancer patients??  My mum and I went shopping on Saturday to look for some square scarves.  She’s found some hats, but nobody is selling good old fashioned square scarves.  All they have are the scarves to put around your neck to match your jackets.  Of course, there’s plenty online, but sometimes you just want to feel it and play around with it before buying it.

This cancer thing is so new to me, that I had no idea the pain of all you have to go through just to get ready for chemo.  Like today, my mum is going to get her drivers license renewed.  It’s not due until October, but she’ll have no hair then, and might not feel up to standing in a line all day at a government office just to have her picture taken.  So here she is the day before chemo, trying to wrap up a few loose ends.

Guess that saying is right….you don’t realize what people go through until you’ve walked in their shoes.

 I hear Gremlin in the bathroom, better go check on him….